Sexless Marriage or Divorce: Is It Right To Walk Away?
Intimacy is a significant part of healthy marital relationships. It covers both the physical and emotional needs of a couple. Yet, research proves that every seventh couple lives in a sexless marriage having intimacy less than several times a year. Many decide to end such relationships adding to a sexless marriage divorce rate. Still, others nurture hope to repair their relationships or are happy with the state of things.
If you face similar trouble but hesitate about the best possible solution, discover when it is right to walk away and when it is better to stay. You will manage to change your life for the better with the right decision.
It Is Better to Save Your Marriage
Before you give up on your sexless relationships and file for divorce in Arizona without a lawyer, you should give your marriage a chance and try to repair it. Here are the cases when divorce is not a preferable option:
Religious Restrictions
In case divorce is beyond your religious beliefs and you cannot afford to quit your marriage unless it meets certain requirements, you have no choice but try to fix everything. Attend couple therapy, investigate the nature of your problem, and crave to solve it together with your partner. Or learn to live without sex but in a peaceful partnership.
The First Marriage
If it is your first marriage and you have problems with sex, it is better not to hurry with radical decisions. Often first-married partners need time to adjust to each other’s habits and preferences both in daily life and intimacy. So, if you are ready to discuss your concerns with your spouse and put in efforts to improve your sexual life together, there is no need to consider divorce at all.
Strong Feelings Are Involved
Sex is just a physical part of relationships, emotional bond is far more important. in case you have strong feelings, love, and support for each other, sexual problems are not going to end it all between you two. Instead, your strong feelings will help you find the way out and fix your troubles soon.
Kids Should Be Your Priorities
Sexual wellness is the desired point for a married adult. But it is not the top priority in your family life. If you have little children, ruining your family just because you are not satisfied with your sexual life is much more than selfish. Instead, you should take care of your children and their well-being and try to save your marriage by committing to your sexual life improvement.
It Is Better to Quit
Yet, sometimes there is no sense in staying married and suffering from a lack of sex. You should learn the signs of your relationships being unrepairable so that you know when to walk away from sexless marriage:
Reluctance to Work on the Issue
You can solve any marital trouble when both spouses are ready to commit and interested in the positive outcomes. But if you or your partner sees no sense in staying married, there is no point in trying to fix it. The reluctance to work on a sexual or any other issue will ruin your marriage eventually. So, you’d better opt for divorce instead of continuing to suffer in an unhappy marriage.
Lack of Sex Is not the Only Challenge
It often happens that sexual disorders are only a small part of marital issues. You may also lack feelings for each other, suffer from PTSD, have problems with sexual health, and so on. In such a case, you should either try to solve all the complementary issues or quit your marriage, if you are not ready to work on them.
Incompatible Sexual Desires
Often sexless marriage is a result of partners having incompatible sexual desires. A partner may have special, more extravagant sexual preferences, or, contrastingly, require gentle and understanding attitude during sexual intercourse. You may try to come to a compromise and experiment in sex for both partners to feel comfortable and satisfied. But if you feel bored with your intimate life or radically displeased, you may consider divorce as a possible solution.
The Infidelity Occurs
Lack of sex and no compromise in intimate life may lead partners to seek sexual pleasure out of marriage. The research claims that most spouses in a sexless marriage have an idea of or opt for cheating to please their desires. Not every couple can overcome infidelity and fix their relationships after one spouse has had an affair. So if you face both troubles at once, no one will blame you when you decide to quit the marriage and try out your happiness with someone else.
Expert Advice to Save Your Marriage
If you've decided to fight for your marriage, Laura Doyle recommends you take an unusual approach to attract your husband again. “As you already know, men are not sexually attracted to their mothers. And they aren’t sexually attracted to women (even supermodels!) who act like their mothers, either." Sure, you think you're being a great wife and in many ways you are, but you may be treating your husband like he's a child - making his doctor's appointments, ensuring he goes to bed on time, telling him what to wear or when he needs a haircut. The list goes on and on.
Often times, the psychological component of our relationship effects our sexual desires and attractions. It's no wonder you may not be attracted to your significant other if your relationship has transitioned into a more paternal one.
"Acting like his mother and being his lover are mutually exclusive, meaning they can't co-exist," but Laura recommends you remember how you behaved when you were first dating. Laugh at each other's jokes, hold hands, show appreciation for even small acts of kindness, and the passion will return.
All in all, your task is not to wonder what percentage of sexless marriages end in divorce but to treat your relationships as a unique case. Analyze your situation, discover what you can do to save your marriage, put in all efforts, ask specialists for help, and only if nothing works, choose divorce as a final solution.
